lifeless.

Friday, April 04, 2008

i'm satisfied with my results cos i got all A's!!!!!!! and my GPA went up from 2.8 to 3.1. of course i was happy, and very shocked. but what's the use. i didn't get into ANY polytechnic. although i was kinda expecting the bad news, i was still a little hopeful you know.

i am so bloody upset!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! like, what the fuck should i do now?! try appealing? this is like the SECOND time i did not manage to secure myself into some stupid poly. i remember the last time i appealed, it was so tedious and frustrating because i had to travel all the way to ngee ann poly by myself on a scorching hot weather. i almost lost my way because i was so dumb around west areas. i left my phone in the toilet and only remembered it when i was about to get on the train but obviously when i went back, it was gone and plus, the phone's not mine. i remember i called my ex boyfriend up using the public phone and he refused to pick up but when he did, i started crying so bad and he screamed at me for being so whiny.

okay. i sidetracked a lot but i swear that had to be the worst day of my life, it was so horrible! i don't wanna go through all of that again just for the sake of appealing which lasted for only 5 measly minutes. and to make things worse, it was UNSUCCESSFUL! haaaaaaaa-haaaaaaaa. -_-" furthermore, most friends's friends of mine have GPA of 4 and yet they still can't get in. so what makes you think someone like me can huh? i am so sick of this!!!!!!!! why can't you just make me attain my diploma normally like everyone else?! (whoever the you is for).

because the bottomline is, I STILL WANT TO STUDY. i do not want to work full-time yet. i am just not ready to be a no-lifer and i have no money to take private diploma. booooooo!

i am not weighing my options very wisely now because i am still not focusing. i can't concentrate properly. so i'll prolly think properly tomorrow.

so, these weekends better be good. i am counting on it to cheer me up. i am soooooooooooo hoping to see you this week! i don't know why but i suddenly wanna meet you so badly today!! or at least, talk to you. =( shit, i think... i miss you? =/ k i better stop because i think you might be reading this. sheesh.

i am in a i-have-no-mood-to-talk-please-just-get-out-of-my-face mood. its that bad. i have a left sore eye! i think i'm having PMS. actually, i AM definitely having PMS lah. ARGH!!!!!!

voiced out
1:28 AM