lifeless.

Saturday, August 02, 2008

the only reason i'm updating at 3 in the fucking morning is that i can't sleeeeeep.

so i met wan, amin and oin today. we watched P2 which was kinda creepy but boring and after dinner, they left so i hung out for a while with nana and yani. after which, met up with kin, fara and zai. me and fara went to tampines after that where firzan fetched us and after sending fara to simei, we went to T3 for coffee bean and a short tour around the place since i haven't been there before. haaaaah.

its amazing being able to meet so many people in one day!

but then again, i am feeling so damn bloody lousy right now. suddenly emotional. i feel so unappreciated all of a sudden. there i was, hanging on when i know for the fact that you never needed me anymore. whenever i see you, there's this incredible sense of happiness that i felt that i couldn't feel with anyone else. the familiar butterflies in my stomach. its as if you literally shine out from the rest. i still have the same feelings earlier but i doubt you even noticed i exist. things are so different now, you are so different, its as if i don't even know you at all. i realised everything is not the same as it is before but sometimes, its hard to swallow the painful facts. i've moved on but i just can't seem to get over you. truth hurts and whether i like it or not, i got no choice. at times i feel so hopeless and stupid cos i care about you when i shouldn't be. as far as i know, everything has ended. i wish i'd snapped me back to reality long ago. because you are just like a fantasy. and everyone knows fantasies are not real.

i have always known it's never gonna be possible again. it's just that i refused to grasp the actual situation. good things always comes to an end. and i should have known that the end has already happened long ago. you have always been my favourite one, Amin. i just wish you're not now.

voiced out
3:30 AM