My So-Called Life

2011-01-27T12:13:00.000+08:00

“I want a boy who will tell me when I’m being stupid. who won’t baby me with his words. a boy who will still give time to his friends. a boy who will tell me ‘no’. he will watch stupid movies with me, but makes me watch his favourites also. a boy who’s willing to drop everything to be with me, but knows when to let it be. a boy who will know he’s important to me, but won’t mind when I change my plans to help someone out. I want a boy who’s enjoyable to look at, he doesn’t have to be gorgeous, I just want someone who I can pay attention to. a boy who will randomly bring me food, because he knows I love to eat. a boy who can make jokes about me, a boy that I can laugh with. someone who won’t mind when I even embarrass myself. a boy who will buy me something, something I would actually want, none of that jewellery crap. someone who doesn’t do everything I ask, but when it comes to something important I can count on him to be there. someone who I don’t feel threatened by. a boy who has other friends that are girls, but I can trust him with them. a boy who will know when to leave me alone when I have my stupid fits. a boy who I can just sit with. I don’t need the whole fairytale deal; I just want to feel comfortable."

2010-07-19T23:13:00.002+08:00

HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHA. this reminds me of my part-time job back at the movie kiosk. "Sweet or salted?" YES. "Which drink you want?" YES. "Small, medium or large?" YES. YOU WANT ME TO PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE?!?! YES! hahahaha.

omg i'm blogging. after donkey years? hahaha. bye!

2010-04-16T23:30:00.003+08:00

i know this sounds crazy and probably impossible too but i wish i could have breakfast with you one day. with just you. cos i've always wanted to see how you look like in the morning, i wanna know how it feels like to wake up and getting excited to see you first thing in the morning, i wanna feel happy knowing that i'm starting the day with you.

it has always been you. i know you knew that.

i've always wished things will take a turn. but i know now it won't.

2010-02-07T01:13:00.002+08:00

just wanna say that i miss the two of you very very much...

To Kin, are you like freakin' busy now or something???? what happen to our pizza hut and seoul garden dates? haha.

To Zai, i hate you for what you did but there's no denying that you're still my friend. i really miss you bro.

i don't know how is it going between the both of you but as much as i hate it, i know it's all for the best.

2010-01-30T15:34:00.002+08:00

i have to say that guys with super thin eyebrows are a major turn-off. fine, pluck them if you want but just don't overdo it can? at least, don't let yours be thinner than your girlfriend's la. sheesh. well, maybe cos i just love guys with thick eyebrows.

so anyway, i'm considering to buy iphone now, thanks to azmi. iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6? iphone or x6?

2010-01-23T16:11:00.001+08:00

i seriously need to get a new phone. like SERIOUSLY! x829382938298392

i HAVE to get this.

by hook or by crook.

2010-01-07T13:54:00.001+08:00

Firzan turns 22 today so HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! :)

and then it hit me. fcuking hell, TWENTY TWO sia. lucky my bday december. haha! at least i get to turn older later than everyone else...

time flies wayyyy too fast.

2009-12-27T13:58:00.002+08:00

not a fan of Taylor Swift at all (NO not bcos of this pic), though i have "You Belong With Me" stuck in my head. excited to see Taylor L on screen as a human, rather than his usual werewolf self. i think Valentine's Day is gonna be a good movie, though i'm not exactly in love or anything like that. can't wait!

2009-12-14T01:36:00.003+08:00

couldn't sleep and was looking thru old albums and stuffs...

just wanna shout this out to Dee, if you're reading...

WHATEVER HAS HAPPENED TO US NOW?!

we used to look so thin and happy! and now we're like...fat and miserable.

2009-12-14T01:07:00.002+08:00

i'm not happy about it but i'm quite proud of myself.

2009-12-03T23:07:00.007+08:00

caught New Moon with the lovelies today. fucking hell, Taylor is hot like shiiiiiiiiiiiiiitttttttttttt.....

favourite scene is when he was talking to bella in the rain...sheesshhh orgasm giler! i swear i can't get enough of him. cullen's body's disgusting btw. oh well, have and will always be Team Jacob! yay. haha.

so anyway, i've turned 21. (this is where u GASP loudly!) cant.believe.it. no huge celebrations, just a few surprises and activities with my closed ones. just how i wanted it to be :) even though i cried on my birthday night cos of something he said (tho it's no big deal but i am just so emotional that day) and i was kinda touched when mum hugged and kissed my forehead, everything else was good :)

2009-11-22T18:44:00.002+08:00

ok peace peace!

ok now say "best!"

ok now say "woohoo!"

ok big huuuuuggg!

one more time!!

big hug agaaaaiin!

miss those lil' rascals!

2009-11-18T16:01:00.001+08:00

Wednesday 2nd Dec 09

Special Screening at GV Great World City / Vivo City

Watch Twilight & New Moon (a day before the actual release) back to back!

7.15pm - Twilight
9.15pm - Break
9.35pm - New Moon

$24 for members, $28 for non-members

With free flow of popcorn and drinks!

What an awesome birthday gift! *hinthint

LOL

2009-11-15T01:09:00.003+08:00

Dreaming about the day when you wake up
And find what you’re looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I’m the one who understands you
Been here all along so why can’t you see
You belong with me, you belong with me

2009-11-08T18:16:00.002+08:00

my saturday was kinda horrible.

i was sooo looking forward to go out but eventually plans got messed up. nothing new. i spent the whole day at home playing sims. i created a new family, new house, my sim got pregnant, gave birth to a girl, grew up, learnt how to talk and walk... so you can pretty much imagine how long i was glued to the laptop.

and he thought i was out with my friends so he didn't wanna bother...well i thought he was busy with that APEC shit so i didn't bother him! "seriously, if i knew you didn't have plans i would have asked you out!" =( too late lah brader...

2009-10-31T12:26:00.004+08:00

Dear Yatie

I dreamt of you 2 nights ago!!! It was your birthday, I just got your gift from MUSTAFA CENTRE hahahaha and was on the way to your house to surprise you with the gift. So when I was reaching, I called you to come down and meet me but you seemed very hesitant, like as though you're hiding something from me. But at last kau turon jugak la and when I saw you under your block,kau pakai baju pengantin sak!! Colour light blue with the veil and everything. HAHA. I was super stunned ah and then you came up to me and i asked "nari kau tunang ke kahwin?" then you said "tunang". then i said "tunang je? abeh asal pakai lawa gila?!" and then aku sedih gila nak mampos sebab kau tak jemput aku!! teros mann datang abeh die pakai baju ala-ala arab gitu...you know those costumes yg orang tuka2 for their wedding photoshoots. seriously takde kene mengene ngn baju pengantin kau. hahahaha! Aku sedih gila teros aku balik naik bus.Somehow or rather Iza was in the bus dudok sbelah aku and then I complained to her about how I wasn't invited to your engagement party and all...abeh kau nak tau ape die reply?? "alah dulu aku tunang pon aku tak jempot kau!" siap dgn muka action die. Kau tau ah kan camne. Wahlao sedih or what!!!!

Eh please ah jangan lupa jemput aku eh nanti.

Thanks. HAHAHAHA.

2009-10-28T21:27:00.002+08:00

yeah man...

yesterday was one of the best meet-ups with the girls. i didn't realise i was being cruel that day until they "woke me up". haha. shit.

i encountered someone named Dnz at work today. how do you even pronounce something with no vowel? and to have it as a name? wth?

2009-10-21T23:46:00.002+08:00

First, mum's stupid boyfriend killed her son cos of jealousy.

Second, mum's crazy boyfriend killed her daughter.

And now, own father killed his daughter cos of cigarettes?! WTF?

seriously man, what the hell is happening? they're just innocent 2 year olds for god's sake. who probably doesn't even know what a freakin' cigarette is.

i get so fumed up everytime i hear stories like this. sickening sons of b**ches!

2009-10-14T22:53:00.003+08:00

i can't understand how you can be so blind?! fine, i know i only have myself to blame now. just when i thought of taking things a step further, you just have to destroy everything!!! EVERYTHING. with that one confession, i seriously crumbled. though i wish i could just back out from all this mess, somehow my tiny heart doesn't want to give it up. it's gonna be hard to pull away from you now and giving me all those stupid hopes and so-called promises doesn't help at all. tell me to fuck off please?

i keep asking myself "what now?"..... shhesshhhh i hate feeling selfish and guilty!! fuck it.

for heaven's sake, why can't i just have a smooth sailing love life?!?!?! kalau asik gini je, tak kawin jugak aku siol. hahahaha.. ARGH!

2009-10-08T22:24:00.010+08:00

i have to admit, i am kinda pretty lost ever since my senior left the company. cos i had to sort of take over her duties and me don't like! i have to closely work with the boss now instead of her and it sucks cos the way we think, the way we work is totally different. oh well.

my senior and the ugly card that i decorated. haha.

so anyway, few events that happened... of cos raya feels like its never ending. last sat had one with the ex mvbiters.

sunday was my uncle's open house / his 3 children's birthday party @ bedok reservoir.

and last wednesday was a buffet dinner @ swissotel merchant court with colleagues.

food was okay, i thought the crayfish especially was great!

but the desserts were SUPERB!

especially the durian paste. OMGGGG its like eating fresh durians, only better!

so what's coming...this sat will be raya-ing again with pelacurs this time round and sunday will be my brother's open house. sigh raya is so tiring lor.....

2009-09-30T13:27:00.000+08:00

past weekends filled with raya visitings.

love my cousins :)

2009-09-20T19:42:00.004+08:00

the night when me and yatie sweat thru geylang for an hour just to get food, drove up to marina barrage and spent the morning munching and watching Wujud on my lappie. iza's super bad road knowledge and mann's hilarious antics made the night worthwhile. even if i have work that same morning and was fully zombified. :)

i ate too much lontong and ayam masak merah, i think i'm gonna puke.

2009-09-11T13:54:00.002+08:00

i bought a laptop at Comex yesterday! like finally! =) thanks soooooooo much to Duri and Azmi for the amaaaazzziiinnnnnggg tips. now you know how stupid i can be when it comes to IT and computers. heh. the promoter was cute and hunky as well so i dont mindddddddd :)

Ungu was really here last week. i thought its false alarm lor. saw the trailer thingy at Suria. dorang jalan-jalan kat GEYLANG sey!!!! if only i had known!!! sigh...

2009-08-17T15:45:00.002+08:00

it's just so HECTIC. i feel like i've been hit with bad luck time and again.

haiz... so SIAN ohhh!!

2009-07-28T13:00:00.002+08:00

how can i not get jealous over this??????!!!!!! NOT FAIR. NOT FAIR. NOT FAIR.

i have been his fan since.....foreverrrrrrrrr and this kin here doesn't even know his name ah abeh dapat jumpe amek gamba lagi!

what the hell! life is so not fair.

2009-07-18T00:33:00.003+08:00

today was a fucked up day at work EARLY IN THE MORNING. what a day to start lor seriously. some people can be so childish at times. don't want to think properly when making decisions. everything also ok ok ok and when something had to happen, you want to blame me fully? you even want to drag your mother into this now? grow up and go fuck yourself la bitch! i'm so freakin' angry!!

i mean, its supposed to be TGIF and i'm pissing my ass of about work? what the hell right!

*breathe in breathe out* okay and i finally remembered to say this. Michael Owen = Man U now? sheesh. its like, my favouritest footballer in the whole wide world, the one that sparks off my first love for soccer going into my most hated....ok well, maybe not most hated..hmm my least likeable club. (??????) i admit i don't watch soccer that much and memang aku macam paham but still..............

so i went home and stuff myself with LOTS of rice, arnolds, kfc, roti boyan. so damn bloated but i felt...a little better only. JUST A LITTLE.

and people pls take note. i am not dating and not going anywhere this weekend. didn't i just mentioned that i have got low self-esteem? yep. thanks for the well wishes anyway. ha-ha.

everything is not going my way ahhhhh!!!

2009-07-15T12:56:00.000+08:00

i think i have a date this weekend. like finally, after so long. haha i think i'll finally go out with him!

but then again...i don't exactly have high self-esteem right now.

sigh...thanks ah.

2009-07-11T01:06:00.005+08:00

so i was browsing through my old pictures and could just sigh...on how my complexion used to be almost flawless and then it got really bad to the extent that my self-esteem was soooo low at that point, and then it got better..and then almost flawless again and now.......i think i'm returning back to that period of time. and the worst part is i simply have no time to visit the clinic now. sigh! i am so f****** depressed! in these kinda things, only those who have went through will understand.

and then i viewed a folder of my past. the one folder that i well, don't really like to see. the happy moments, the silly faces, the stupid antiques. i did smile...but surprisingly enough, it still brought tears to my eyes. i'm not sure what those tears meant but all i could say is, first love is amazing. in my opinion, nothing beats the feeling of falling in love for the first time. i had mine, and i had moved on. but no matter what, the memories will stay with me forever. :)

ok that's it!!!! stop being such an emotional wreck cos on a happier note, my dearest girlfriend turns 21 on this day!

be a good girl and continue to be the sweet, fun loving girl that you are.... love you :)

2009-07-03T20:24:00.005+08:00

okay so anyway, just thought i'd share this...

last weekend met up with these 2 idiots...

to celebrate azmi's 22nd birthday!!!

it was really the miniest and the last minute-est birthday celebration ever. hahahaha. hope you like the gift anyway! =)

muhd happy with his new car. HAHA

happy birthday again...! my wish for you is to quickly pass your TP so 3 of us can go jalan2 malam2 ok! hehe.

then i stumbled upon this....

sial ah hot or what!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i super cannot wait!!!

well, earlier on i was so busy and lost and quite fucked up at work cos my senior fell sick and had to leave so i had to cover her duties which i hate to do so bcos since she's a senior she obviously had more work thus it made me had more work and besides that i had to do my work too...but but but! upon seeing this poster and the arrival of my VS shoes, they TOTALLY TOTALLY made my day!

talking about those shoes, its kinda contradicting for me to purchase them cos i'm not exactly a heels kinda person and those that i ordered are killer wedges. KILLLLLLER. fullstop.

i am so going to print that out and paste it in my room. to give me motivation every morning or something.

2009-06-28T23:23:00.019+08:00

3 weeks ago, yet still fresh in my mind. i don't have anymore sibling weddings to look forward to now! =(

so anyway, though its kinda late... well, super late actually to blog about this, i still want to. heee. 6th June 2009 was the solemnization ceremony held at Darul Aman Mosque and the wedding reception for the bride's side at Kampong Ubi CC.

the baju kebaya, emporio armani watch, LV bag and telekong

bobbi brown makeup, wedding bands from lee hwa, nokia e65 and sony dslr

the cupcakes, ferrero rocher and bunga rampai

posing with $9k...

the groom and the fat dumpling (!!!)

cousins!

all set! tapi dalam hati confirm nervous. haha.

the Lexus car

preparing to go...

otw to the mosque

the moment. pretty smooth. heh.

officially Mr and Mrs Rosli!

some of my relatives...

from the girl to the guy...

sony erricsson xperia, toshiba laptop, gucci wallet, PS3 (which is damn heavy, no one wants to carry it back home!)

raoul shirt, baju kurung, emporio armani watch and cupcakes!

arrived @ the CC

the wedding cake (haha i didn't know how to get rid of the woman sitting there cos its kinda an ugly sight so had to make do with the lens flare thingy hahaha)

makan time!

performance by sri mahligai

then we waited outside for the newlyweds to change...

and waited...

AND WAITED...!

finally~! it was a really looooooong wait and the scorching hot weather didn't help at all

walking...

passing through the "guards"

glamorous in gold. i looooooooove the colour. i've always thought gold looks good on pengantins

performance and viewers

silat show

performance and viewers

family I

family II

siblingz~

END OF SATURDAY!

then came 7th June 2009, the wedding reception of the groom over @ my place! i was very pissed off early in the morning bcos of my aunt's lipstick stain on my baju!!!!! fortunately it wasn't so obvious. it was a pretty bad start of the day. haha but everything else was gooooood!

the dais. red and black, the best colour combi EVER. or was it maroon? ok whatever.

the decor.

my "mak andams" who came really early in the morning to help me do my hair and makeup!

us and zai

the earlybirds

wedding cake

the portrait

close relatives

haha i really like this candid shot!

girls!....and a boy. hahaha.

guestbook signing...

budak-budak mentel

2,000 guests, more or less in total

senior citizens' corner. HAHA

FOOD!!!!!

arrival of the newlyweds. so sad i didn't manage to capture a pic of the harley escort cos it was too fast! =(

walking...accompanied by the kompang group Dermaga Seni Pustaka

silat show

pretty in pink!

performances by Zoul and DSP

with the parents

family~

random shots

the dedications

evening wear. yay to red and black!

cutting cake ceremony

performing Gurindam Jiwa

ok, pengantin pon lapar jugak...

poses

awwwww touching moments

cousins from dad's side

mum's side

the couple expressing their gratitude

time to go...

them karakoe-ing last kopek punye to wrap up the event!

AND THAT'S IT!

i love weddings!! i wish it will go on for 2 weeks instead of 2 days. haha. i must say that i am very proud of my brother. to kak fizah, we welcome you officially to our family now! =) hopefully another twins? or even better, triplets perhaps? hehehe. thank you brother i finally have my own room now!! hahaha. wish you guys all the best!

okay this is a long post, tired and really need to sleep now...

hopefully like this everyday! haha!

2009-06-17T12:44:00.002+08:00

it's funny how when you're there for someone, they never appreciates but once you almost totally forgot about them, they'll come back trying to make things right.

typical~

anyway, my brother uploaded a photo @ his facebook during his honeymoon...

i'm not exactly a fan of Man U but amazed still!!!! London..Paris..i'm sure they're having the time of their life now. =D

i know i've yet to update about his wedding last 2 weeks. well, it was really great and super fun! all pictures are at fb though. will post here some someday :)

2009-06-03T00:49:00.006+08:00

SHIAT I'M SO EXCITED. 1:34!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! told ya werewolves are sexaaay. even better than vampires.

so anyway.... this happened yesterday.

mum : you're gonna wear your last 2 years baju on your bro's nikah rite? go try la...sekali wont fit

me : *puts on a ARE YOU KIDDING ME look* tsk! please la ma! its not as if i gained weight that much rite!

10 mins later...

me : actually kan ma, thats not such a bad idea ah.

so i tried on...and we struggled quite a bit to stuff my body into the corset. LOL. it can fit laa but i think i look like one fat dumpling lor! in case you're wondering why dumpling, my baju's green.

and i am definitely having my break outs. GROANS. like, of all timings...why now??!?!?!?!

2009-05-27T13:38:00.002+08:00

"but why me? why did you like me? i'm not pretty, i don't have money and i got no status"
"cos i got all of that. money, status, looks... i don't need that from you. Geum Jan Di, all you have to be is just to be Geum Jan Di"

ahhhhhhhhhhh sweet or whatttttttttttttttttt!! i know i've said this for the umpeenth time but i swear i'm such a sucker for romance shows. *sigh*

my $100 zara vouchers that i got last december for my birthday will be expiring this june. yeah, i haven't use it sia. sampai da nak 6 months. i realised that i've not been going out shopping for the past weeks? ok maybe the flea market last 2 weeks not counted la. its all clickin' here and there now. online shopping's so addictive! why must anything online related be so addictive huh?? ok ok today today!! i'm going to spend all of it today!!

please please please dear god.. no breakouts on my bro's wedding. i wanna look good too... please please please!

2009-05-24T05:44:00.004+08:00

its nearly 6am and i have yet to sleep. another obsession alert. hah!

yes, its the much talked about drama series Boys Over Flowers. i know, i'm like super behind time but today is finally the day that i can really start in watching this show. i can proudly say that i am hooked already. i mean, when you have actors like...

the undeniably drop dead gorgeous Lee Min-Ho (okay, don't mind the curls)

and the superbly cute Kim Sang Bum... (he's like what, only 20? unbelievable)

there's no way that you can NOT get addicted.

look he's got freakin' dimples!!!!

OH GOD ASIAN BOYS ARE SO FUCKEN HOT.

i watched a few episodes online today and i really cannot tahan already so although i really hate to do it, i proceeded to watch the last part of the last episode. haha! so i now know who gets to end up with who and its not upsetting at all so yeah...! *thumbs up*

besides staying home on a weekend watching this drama and surfing about all these guys, i spent the first half day you-tubing about Adam Lambert. damn right, can't get enough of him. i love when he's doing all those interviews! cos he's just so likeable, friendly and so humble! what a great guy... (ceh macam da lame kenal hahaha)

so all in all, the Internet has always been my saviour on a boring weekend. what will i ever do without it... *sigh*

2009-05-21T12:58:00.005+08:00

WORLDWIDE SHOCK

So we all know now.... Kris Allen is Season 8's American Idol!

Well, congrats Kris... but I can't accept the fact that he actually won over Adam Lambert!!!!! Its not that he's horrible, he's not. He's very talented and cute but he's just so...normal. And yeah, I am not actually in the Kris Allenation zone.

Cos I am a Glambert! LOL. I admit I am not exactly an American Idol fan but I followed on this season because of him! He has always been the consistent one, the stylish, the most unique, most original and the most different from the rest. Definitely an Idol material.

I still believe he totally deserves to win. Just look at yesterday's performance... I think he did a better job than Kris!

But oh well... at least he's the runner-up. I think if I'm eligible to vote, it would make a difference. hahaha...

I believe that even though he's not the winner, he'll always have his true supporters behind him. He'll make albums, sell millions of them and be a worldwide sensation! Oh yes he will... :)

I'll miss your screams, Adam :(

2009-05-19T13:14:00.000+08:00

i had the worst lunch today. i ordered mee soto and when i'm back at the office to eat, i realised that the uncle gave me BEE HOON. and i forgot to ask him to take the TAUGEY out.

bee hoon + taugey = superduperyuckymucky

i continued to eat anyway cos i was lazy to get it changed and then, it was VERYYY SPICYYY!!!! too hot too handle!! at last, i think i finished only half of it and bloated cos of drinking too much. wtf rigggght.

its about 3 weeks to my brother's wedding and i'm the one getting the jitters!

2009-05-14T12:40:00.002+08:00

WOW. Kris Allen's acoustic version of Heartless was AMAZING.

last two nights, i had a wonderful dream. i dreamt that i had the chance to go Australia to study. I dreamt that I was packing my bags, saying goodbye to everyone and heading to the airport. But when I woke up, I realised that I had to go to work.

Do you know how depressing that feels?!

Rossa - Terlanjur Cinta (feat. Pasha)

2009-05-03T18:31:00.001+08:00

i absolutely love it when they do a duet together. pasha is amaaaaazingggg! Ungu quickly make a new album and come to singapore again pleaseeeee.... hehehehe.thank god adam lambert was not out last week. i don't think i'll be watching again if he does get voted out. What's Idol without Adam anyway?! he'll win, for sure. (ceh confident per)

so yesterday was a trip to town with my horror movie buddies azmi and muhd and we caught... Jangan Tegur. the only good sides are the sound effects and the suspense, which can make people die one. i don't think the matsaleh actress can act that well and the ghost towards the end of the movie seriously resembles that character from LOTR. anyway nothing new, i still got my bag to cover my face almost throughout the whole movie. haha!

because of this bloody FLU BABI, i may have to work overtime this week. *cries*

2009-04-26T04:04:00.002+08:00

I LOVE ITS 10th EPISODE!!!!!!!! LOVE LOVE LOVE IT SO MUCH! its coming to an end soon, this show only got 13 episodes sia. so sikit!! i can't get enough of Jiro omggggggg!! sweet nak mampos ok... *sigh*

oh and anyway, you MUST watch this movie. its reaaaaaaallllllllyyyyyyy rrreeaaallllyyy good. greatly recommended. trust me. watch and see for yourself. seriously. go. watch. now! hahaha.

i can't believe saturday is over! wth

2009-04-22T13:23:00.004+08:00

oh my god i feel so stuck and suffocated. its not that i hate my job, i just don't like it. what the fuck am i still doing heerreeeeee?!! you see, after i get home from work i'll be too tired to do any job hunt. i'll either sleep or slack the rest of the day away. weekends, i'll be relaxing too much to even bother about finding a job. and even IF i were to go for any interviews during office hours, i have to apply for leave la this la that la bla bla bla....... its so leceh ah! and if i quit without finding a job first, that would be the stupidest thing ever lah obviously. wellll probably i need to sacrificeeeee...sacrifice my weekends.....and sacrifice my free time... boooohoooooo. and furthermore, my desktop at work deserves to be thrown into the sea!!!! lagging nak mampos and its pissing me off every single day!

on a happier note, dad was finally discharged last 2 days...bad news is that he was terminated from work or something close to that. hmmm one problem after another. oh well, as long as he gets well soon; that should be the most important thing right now. and happy 62nd birthday dad! =)

*picture courtesy of twilighters.org

and anyway, these half naked guys makes me drool. Ok, the most left is my favourite ah. I can't wait for New Moon! Especially to be able to see my Taylor in action. hehehehe. sexy gilerrrr~

2009-04-16T13:27:00.007+08:00

Sentosa last Friday with the babezzzz was awesome! we walked aimlessly for a start...sweating and panting like dogs. haha!

we finally settled @ palawan only at 2pm plus, gobbled up our chicken rice, played cards...roughly for about 45 minutes when it started to rain HEAVILY. boring ah! gi sentosa MESTI hujan!!

it lasted for an hour... which is not so bad. we did all that we could to survive from the boredom.

riena joined us after a while and we managed to get on the Cineblast Logride, the 4d Pirates Show and the Cable Car.... for free!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =D

a holiday indeed. fuck fuck fuck work.

2009-04-11T11:38:00.002+08:00

first of all, a dedication to my ex-classmate, my colleague, my partner-in-crime & my gossip kaki. a very Happy 21st Birthday to you!

oops.. wrong picture. hehehehe.

amek kau 21!!! ahahahhaa. have fun being old while i enjoy the rest of my remaining months as a 20 year old. =D

on another note, orang gila je la keje on saturday... hahaha but get this, i am one of them lah sia!! pffft so much for longer weekends.

2009-04-06T13:45:00.000+08:00

so i met up with yani @ balestier yesterday after her work for Fast & Furious 4 and the moment yani / shiela saw me, the FIRST thing they said was.... "eh tembamnye kau!!" / "what happen to you ahh? why so chubby???" hehehe good lah.. happy wat! (ceh in denial kape, padahal dalam hati siak ah, confirm aku dah gemok ah nie! @$%#@%!!)

anyway, awesome movie + awesome companion = a day well spent =) but seriously, i am leading a boring but happy life now. weeeee hehehee.

2009-03-27T13:23:00.004+08:00

i had so much fun last sunday, together with the bestfriend & brudder. the career fair @ suntec was so troublesome and nothing much too, totally waste of time. we raided the Robinsons sale @ expo after that where i managed to grab a pathetic pair of working pants and then to the Popular sale where kin CONQUERS the place. heh. i had my first dinner at Popeyes which i think is not too much of a difference to KFC and kin was so kental cos she couldn't even take one tiny sip of the bloody syrup! hahahaha booooooooooooooo! kental kental kental!

zai a.k.a the artist made this ugly piece for me. haha.

i've been trying to drag the girls + zai to the zoo this weekend but i wonder what is so funny about that ahhh?? klaka ke kalau nak gi zoo???? haha haiyoh. dad is probably gonna be in for another 2 weeks or so, will be undergoing another op. hmmmm hopefully everything will be fine before my bro's wedding in June.

and i actually thought i could enjoy my salary yesterday. my cheque was bloody bounced and my bosses are all the way in hong kong so i have to wait till monday sia! wth.

2009-03-20T15:48:00.002+08:00

Presenting my new obsession...

Taiwanese drama ToGetHer!

I accidentally watched this last Saturday and was hooked eversince. thank god i'm able to watch the previous episodes online! funny and so sweeeeeeeeeetttttt lor the show. plus the lead actor is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cute!

JIRO JIRO JIRO!!! hahahahaa i feel like an ah-lian siaaa... wahlao eh.

2009-03-12T17:08:00.008+08:00

first and foremost, a very belated HAPPY 24th BIRTHDAY to one of my bestest girlfriends everrrrr! i wish nothing for you except to get married soon. hehe. kidding, babe! i'm happy that things are going on well for you now.

and a HAPPY BELATED 19th BIRTHDAY TO my brudderrr Zai! hopefully you love the so-called mini surprise last saturday =)

anyway i watched this a few weeks ago...

i simply loved it!

mostly because this movie is basically about what each and everyone of us had or is going through in our love lives. I can so totally relate to Gigi, not with the desperatemeasures for a boyfriend and the overconfident feelings! but the constant "is he gonna call me?" wonderings. hahaha. she did find the love of her life in the end, which i hope i can relate to one day too. =D

of course i teared at the end when Neil went down on his knees to propose! sweet giler lah!!! it's just that i thought Jennifer Aniston and Ben Affleck don't look good together. haha. god, i'm such a sucker for romance films.. and i am superrrrrrr excited also because a LOT of superhero movies are showing soon!!

so movies aside, it has already been 2 weeks plus since my dad's admission in hospital. i just hope he recovers and go home soon. its pitiful to see him lost weight cos he's not enjoying the food there. he has always been a really big eater and it's just so weird. i went to visit him yesterday and he has a new "neighbour" whose brother is superbly gorgeous ala ala Chinese American gitu, i swear i was literally staring at him all the way heheheheh. but his brother is only there for 1 night so that was the 1st and the last time that i'll be seeing him. =( and dah sememangnye aku suke budak-budak because he is an ITE student. err no commentzxzzxzzxxxzx....

plus, last thursday has gotta be one of the worst days of my life. its the fucking second time!!!!!!!! i feel so STUPID and REJECTED. *wails* i need a new phone baaaaadlyyyy, serves me right for finally losing it. and just when i am thinking of getting a new job, i have just been confirmed as a staff lah dey. no more probation and they are offering to sponsor a diploma to me as well. this, i have to think through cos i'm still pretty unsure about my interest in HR. looking back at the job market now, its probably an unwise decision to quit lah so i guess..... i shall suffer in silence for now. SIGH. my life is seriously getting so routined and behold cos the depression season is back! tsk pimples lah. =(

and now, i truly understand the joy and satisfaction when shopping at flea markets. when you and your friend are tossing the bundle of clothes together and you managed to pull out something really pretty and cheap from out of nowhere and to see the look on your friend's face.... is PRICELESS. hhahahahaha! sorry kin i love you! bring souvenirs back for me! =p

oh and i TOLD you adam lambert is AMAZING!!!!!!! he did a terrrrrrrrriiiiffffiiiiiiicccccccccc job in that MJ's song! phew. ok, and did i tell you i gain 3 fucking kilos? omg. bye.

2009-02-24T13:05:00.002+08:00

OMG did you guys watch The Oscars yesterday? just LOOK at Hugh Jackman.... SEXIEST MAN ALIVE INDEED!

and Robert Pattinson looks good too... clean-cut and handsome. heh heh heh.

i just had fried rice for lunch and i am super full + sleepy. 5 more hours to go.................................

HELP!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-02-22T21:42:00.005+08:00

you know, before you wanna criticize me on something that i do or didn't do, please take a look at your close surroundings first. fine, you're a relative, an elderly and all that jazz but maybe before you wanna lecture me on those sensitive religious issues, take a look at your own child. i bet anyone could easily say that she is no better than me. worse, in fact. please understand that it is purely by respect that i kept my mouth shut. i could have spurt out everything right to your face if i want to be rude.

that aside, its funny how time flies when you're having fun. ok maybe not fun fun but i was kinda enjoying myself. i had 3 days MC from thursday which simply means an early extended weekend, all THANKS (i mean, really!) to my super red right eye probably due to the dirty lenses. hehe. and all i did for the 3 days was bumming at home; playing the sims for hours, facebook games, TV, breaking dawn (yes, not quite finished) and sleep. how could i not be happier? =D

weirdly enough, i have never been a huge fan of american idol but i have been faithfully following the series this time round. thank god for Danny Gokey! i would have just shut my tv off if Tatiana made it. she's just so...whiney and irritating. and my favourite will be on next week's round! Adam Lambert!! *excitedexcited* hehehehhehe.

the other thing that i am surely excited about is my first GST package this year! and an extra $200 i hope? *hintsatkin* hahahaha!

so before i log off and enjoy the next remaining hours before sleep and back to work tomorrow (DRATSSSSSS), i'll just share how kin was her silly self yesterday.

Me : Kau katne?

Kin : Now with Zai. Oh tadi i went to Clarke Quay, ade flea market.

Me : Sbelah mane?

Kin : Yang kat riverwalk tu, ape tempat tu, Home United ah.

Me : Home United???? (i was thinking, clarke quay-home united-flea market? definitely not linked.)

Kin : Oh bukan bukan, Homeclub lah.

HAHAHAAHAHAHHA!! i was distracted with the twins at my home at that point so i wasn't really laughing but when i think about it now, it sure is funny like hell.

oh my, i miss my girls! and fara, you owe me picturesssssssssss!!

2009-02-14T12:10:00.002+08:00

first, it was the bloody cold that made me sneeze all day at work that had me MC-ed for the next day. and now, its this sickening cough! argh, what luck.

so anyway, i have been developing hatred for my work lately. i guess probably this industry is just not my cup of tea and so you can imagine my pain going to work every single morning. i hate this feeling, cos i wanted to do something that i enjoy and not dread. =(

its the weekends again and today being Vday is totally not helping at all. big deal, no? hahaha.

and before i forgot, Congratulations to Iza for making it!! I am so happy that you'll be able to get a career headstart in something that you've always had a passion for. this calls for a celebration! next week k, girls? ;)

2009-02-05T13:29:00.002+08:00

i love sundays with my lovelies :) hopefully we can make every sunday our girlie time together. its too bad that we always run out of time. and money.

2009-01-21T21:08:00.007+08:00

come.....and then go. i am getting so used to it, i could just easily laugh it off now. i have totally lost count already. haaahaaaa. of course, no feelings were attached or anything close to that even but i just thought, you know, we were getting along well as friends. is the status of friends even hard to sustain? oh gosh. forget it, i don't deserve to have a companion lah. BOOOOOOOOOOOO.

easy to say, it's best to indulge yourself in fantasies to spare yourself from the pain and agony so that is why i can't freeeeaaaakkkkiinninggg wait for New Moon to hit the screens! it's all about jacob which means, more of taylor! gorgeous or what?!

and rumour has it that vanessa hudgens is probably gonna be in the movie as leah clearwater, or at least, has auditioned for it. wooo, she's gonna be a werewolf! if it really does happen, i'm glad we can remember her as something better rather than a whiny singing gabriella. heh. i'm halfway through Eclipse now, which i am purposely taking my own sweet time to complete just to immense myself in the moment fully and to also have a err, reading material for as long as i can. =D

back to reality - work has been up and down, sometimes i feel like giving it all up and other times i feel like i probably could hang on a little longer. i'll be trying my luck again for april's intake but then again, no hopes should be set too high. a close aunt of mine is struggling to fight for her dear life which is truly heartbreaking. i just hope that before she passed on, all of us could be there to make her happy. my brother's wedding is drawing near and i am super excited!! i hope all the plannings and the arguments at home over that will all be worthwhile.

anyway, i owed my bestest buddy in the world a birthday wish so HAPPY VERVERYBELATED BIRTHDAY FIRZAN! i hope you'll still be crazy even at 21 years =)

haha! look at the change in us! we've sort of grown up together, he's seen me at my worst and i have seen him at his. i really miss our times in school, especially dnt class! oh my, those were the days. haha. he's always been a great friend =D

not forgetting, a happy 21st to Rina! we had a great time at your party the other day although our dear fara slept throughout the WHOLE night. tsktsktsk.

hope you love the guestboard =)

2009-01-03T15:33:00.012+08:00

yes, i am officially one of those people who got hooked, like really hooked. the moment i saw the trailer, i knew it was definitely my kind of movie. you know, superhero fantasy kind. and after i watched it, i was curious to know how the book will turn out. yeah call me slow, only to watch and then read. hah. but i wasn't dissappointed!

i think stephenie meyer is a GREAT author. she used smooth, beautiful language in her work and she did a brilliant job in pulling me further into her book. the love phrases were amazing.

i am totally crazy over edward cullen!! i have no idea a vampire could be extremely sexy and captivating. gorgeous, sleek, flawless and elegant. its the first time that i actually have butterflies in my stomach when reading a book and i am not exaggerating!

the movie was alright, in my opinion. of course the book is a million times better; more in-depth, more emotions, more expressive, more romance, more history.

robert pattinson definitely make the PERFECT edward cullen. he totally fits the bill!tall,dangerously handsome, and his eyes....omg his eyes! i love the way his hair was made up in the movie with the pale skin and all. its just so... vampire-ish.

kristin stewart on the other hand, could be better i guess. she needs to show and feel the love! sometimes her expressions are so blank, its almost as if she couldn't be bothered.

i was also excited to see cam gigandet as james because he was soooo evil but handsome all at the same time. but its just too bad that he died. TSK.

alice cullen is cute! with her spiky hair and pretty face. i love it how the characters that were portrayed in the book seems to match so much with the actors in the movie.

my favourite scene was when edward saves bella from the van...oooohh myy gooddd..the way he stared at bella so intently. it sent a shiver up and down my spine everytime i watch that part (its been 3 times now). and the baseball scene was reaaaally cool!

i have been calling up numerous bookstores but book 3 and 4 seems to be out of stock EVERYWHERE. so i did what i had to do, i went to azizah's place yesterday after work to borrow book 2 and 3 from her. we spent about an hour in her room surfing the net and talking about anything twilight/edward related! we're so obssessed, i know.

2008-12-26T16:42:00.031+08:00

well! a few events took place of late and i think i had a fair share of fun the past few days. =)

we had an advanced christmas party at our boss, clara's place. it was huge and comfortable and we had a good time socializing and talking about non-work related matters.

me, annabelle, kerlyn, meital, dee, lizel

barbecue!!!

we had satay, prawns, crayfish, otah and even stingray!

after all of us were full, it was games time! me and dee were in a diff group, sadly. the first game was charades and it was kinda annoying, somehow. dee's group almost died cos we gave like really tough ones. but they still managed, so booooo.

second game was the classic pass-the-band-with-your-mouth. hahaha it was hilarious!

third game was guess-the-number which was boring and the last one happening giler. we had to tie balloons to our feet and to burst the opponents' balloons. god, it was scary. my hands were on my ears the whole time. haha.

dee's group won ALL games so they got some vouchers and then we had to exchange gifts! i got a mascara which was just what i needed. =)

i was more excited for the day after that actually cos it was Singapore VS Vietnam's match!!!!! the bestest part was that my Shahril played in the first 11! so i dragged kin with me to catch the action with fara and her family.

i think kin is probably the noisiest spectator i have ever heard. she was shouting like nobody's business! baik ar leh jadi assistant coach raddy ah gini.

the stadium was fuuuuuuuuuullllllll~!

singapore lost =( but i really don't think it's a waste of time because i am soooo proud to see Shahril play for the whole of first half! Though he just recovered from lung infection and all. He's the hero, haven't you heard?? Hehehehe so obsessed kaaan.

last tuesday was a sheesha session with the girls. An all-girls time, FINALLY!

Xmas Eve was great cos all of us got to leave a little earlier. We had a mini celebration before that where the boss handed a Xmas gift for everyone of us. Me and dee got a Clinique perfume each!

Lucky draw winners! i got $20 worth of TAKA vouchers =)

the logcake was deliciouzzzzz! i feel like i've been receiving a lot of gifts lately. Hehehehe sukeeerrr skali!

the usual group met up that to bid our farewell to fara who flew off to KL yesterday night. Bring me nano2 ok! and a souvenir would be nice. haha we miss you already!!!!!!

2008-12-21T01:14:00.004+08:00

that whole incident made me totally regretful of agreeing on the meet-up. i didn't mind so much about the type of group that you brought but i was fucking pissed on the attitude. for the first time, i was actually relieved to get away from you and the whole situation. if you had wanted to show "the other side" of you, you can jolly well do it without me around. I, FYI, despised that kinda characteristic and I was upset because I didn't know you could even be like that. i wish you'd grow up. FAST.

i hereby promise myself that today will be the last time i am ever gonna associate myself with "younger boys" again.

the end.

2008-12-12T15:32:00.002+08:00

i am at work and i am super bored like fuck. work has been like this for the past few days and it sucksssssss!

ok right now, i am suddenly feeling kinda...lonely? i don't know. i've not felt like this for a really long time and now... okay i really don't know... =(

2008-12-05T16:49:00.019+08:00

my birthday was simple yet lovely! it doesn't matter that no extravagant surprises or high-class restaurants were involved cos all my loved ones were there to celebrate it with me. =)

last saturday was the first so-called "surprise" from the moviebiters. i was expecting it already lah! all thanks to the wrong messages sent to me. haha. you guys are so cute. we had dinner and i wasn't expecting the whole restaurant crew to come out with a cake at the end! i guess that was the real surprise after all. :) we watched the pretty fireworks after that and thats when i realised that nana can literally go crazy with fireworks! she's like super obsessed with them! hahaha. we played silly games and i swear we totally had fun. yusran gave me this really pretty notepad+pen from esprit. just what i needed for work! THANK YOU SO MUCH MY DEAR FRIENDS and especially to my "blood sis" izyani (ha!ha!ha!) who took so much trouble to plan it for me!

as usual on the strike of midnight on the actual day, the whole family (which includes both of my aunts' families who were sleeping over) sang a birthday song to me at the top of their lungs. the second surprise came when my brother handed me a Samsung MP3 player this time round!! wooooo! he sure takes my casual conversations into action. hehe. so, THANKS TO YOU AND KAK FIZAH =)

i had work on my birthday and the colleagues bought a cake for the december babies which includes sharon and kerlyn. the third surprise was when they gave me Zara vouchers worth $100! THANKS COLLEAGUES!

fara wanted to meet me after work that day and so i casually asked kin along who claimed that she has problems and had no mood to go out and whatever shitzxzxzxzxz. i totally believed her k! fara steered me into a corner and then kin, zai and fad were already there waiting for me with a cake! SPEECHLESS!

we had our pool+daytona session after that and i guess my birthday luck wasn't really on my side that day. =p

we settled for mac's for a super late dinner since almost all the other food places were closed.

and yes, our dear fara has a boyfriend now and i am very truly happy for her... =)

dee finally came back to work the next day after a looooong leave to KL and she gave me these delicious cookies! THANK YOU BABE!

so once again, THANK YOU to evvveeeerryyyoonneee who made a birthday wish to me. especially to those who said "Happy 16th Birthday". nyahahaha! and a special shoutout to my precious ones who actually took the effort to spend time with me on my 20th. i couldn't be happier. *blows kisses*

2008-11-22T12:36:00.000+08:00

it's funny how i am dyyyyiiinnnggg for weekdays to be over so that i can enjoy myself fully during the weekends but when saturday finally comes, its either i am totally lazy to go out or i got no plans at all.

anywayyyy, i finally watched High School Musical 3 last saturday! so much for anticipating the opening but only watching it 2 weeks later. hah! that's only because its so hard to find a friend who's actually into the show like i do! the potential ones would have watched it by then. so sad. me and firzan caught the show at downtown east and hopefully we didn't miss any important parts although we're like 10 mins late cos this smart boy over here drove to Tampines Mall instead. =p i love the movie so much! its so vibrant, so energetic and so colourful! zac efron adds to the plus points as well of course. =D we then proceeded to jalan kayu to meet faiz, siti,amru and farhan for supper cum impromptu reunion.

sunday was nura's wedding and she looked beautiful and happy. =) it was a great catching up session for the ex moviebiters as well. me and azmi waited for muhd at tiong bahru for a freaking 2 hours after that before we made our way to zouk's flea market. the stuffs there are expensive. god, why is it even called a flea market in the first place?

so today, is a new weekend all over again. my frens are going out on dates and i am finishing work in 25 minutes time. i'll prolly just rot at home.

2008-11-08T00:28:00.003+08:00

i can't believe i actually paid close to 200 bucks for a bag. its sooo not me to spend so much on something lah. but it wasn't an impulse buy i swear! cos i need a bag. costly=long lasting. right?.................

2008-11-01T18:12:00.011+08:00

last thursday, me & A went to have dinner at Manhattan Fish Market and it was very disappointing! not up to our expectations but service was ok though. Fish & Co wins hands down. and while we're sitting outside the cathay, some random european guy roufled A's hair, said "i'm in a good mood tonight" and actually passed him 40 bucks. both of us literally had our jaws hanging and we quickly moved out from that place in case he changed his mind. haha! it was weird but we splitted the money anyway. =p

and then comes friday... what else but!!

THIS!

the show was AWESOME, the lightings were SUPERB, the crowd was GREAT and Pasha was just SO MESMERIZING. he's humourous, connects well with the audience, super good looking especially in person and his voice simply melts each and everyone of us. what a talented guy! i was really glad that they performed my most favourite song in the world - Tercipta Untukku :)

the guy who stole my heart that night...awwwww!

Oncy... comel banget deh.

*GASP!* look who we saw!

firzan's dad fetched us to have supper at Al-Ameen before sending fara and me home. thanks firzan!

i am officially still having the Ungu fever. *sigh.....*

2008-10-19T00:23:00.005+08:00

thanks to dee, i am officially stuck on to this song. jason mraz is so easy to love!

however, feeling quite the opposite of the song title. i had this really bad headache and flu last thursday which made me took half day MC and i had to drag myself to work the next day. thank god its the weekends already. i can't afford to take anymore MCs man. wasted nearly $50 on cab rides for those 2 days. sheesh. having a cold for 3 days straight is not funny ok. hopefully this goes away soon. i hate being sick!!!

on a much brighter note, i can't wait for this! =D

i hope its not disappointing. maybe i should be mrs bolton instead... =p

2008-10-12T02:19:00.022+08:00

HARI RAYA OUTING - 5th OCT 2008

I couldn't deny the fact that the outing was so much fun, with my relatives all getting excited to board the lorry via the "lift". haha. i really love these kinda family bondings. what i really hate, was my baju for that day. the material is so hot, the glitterish thingys on my kain sticks everywhere on my body! and i think its not that pretty afterall. i don't think i am ever going to wear it again. that's the result for buying when you're half asleep

so tomorrow, or should i say later on, will be another lorry outing. every weekend asik raya je, bila nak game. penat beb.

2008-10-05T02:37:00.004+08:00

Hari Raya this year feels...normal. I totally didn't have the spirit at all!

the night of raya eve was spent at azmi's house eating his mum's deliciouzzz dishes with muhd, after which we played with sparklers with his aunt and cousins and taking polaroid pictures which ended up all smokey. as per normal, my first day of raya was spent at home looking ugly wearing home clothes while relatives streamed in with new clothings. my cousins are all so grown up now! i rarely see them although we only live a few blocks away from each other. sume dah pandai got boyfriends already. hmph. 2nd day was to my granny's sister's house for a mere 2-3 hours and it felt different without her around.

the only best part was of course, green packets! muahahaha yes i am still entitled although i'm working ok! cos i'm 16 what. and not forgetting my mum's ayam masak merah. i think i could eat that dish forever.

so to sum it all up, this year's celebration = boring. i rarely even took pictures cos my camera sucks. that explains the image-less entry. i'm so pathetic...

2008-09-20T11:50:00.004+08:00

i'm at work and its half day today which meansssssss....... about an hour more to go!! arggggh.

the boss is not around, and all my colleagues who sat behind me are not working so i'm currently enjoying my 4 hours at work right now surfing the net. huhu. i've been bloghopping like nobody's business and i am irrrrrritated with blogs that are like so self-obsessed! like, displaying 24563435 of your solo pictures in a SINGLE entry. please lahhh. and me & dee's favourite topic recently, COUPLES. hahahaha. "today is the day NadiAliff was born" (just some random names). or nadia_heart_aliff@hotmail.com. our job scope deals with different kind of emails everyday so, you get the drift. haha. and talking about aliff (why is it even aliff in the first place, beats me), i actually saw Aliff Aziz yesterday at Geylang!!!!!!!!! although he was with his matrep-ish friends, you still turn me on man. haha ok, i sound like an immature 15-year old minah.

anyway, i is doing good. of course my life is far from perfect but so far, my family's great, my friends are always there and i have sufficient money to get me by everyday. heh. its just that.................. i miss having a boyfriend! WAHAHAHAHA WHAT THE FISH. but true to a ceeeertain extent lah. oh and another thing i just realised is, time is GOLDEN. really, half of my mondays to fridays are gone just by working and when i got home, i will eventually fall asleep like reaaaally fast that i miss talking to my mum sometimes. and its been quite some time since i snapped pictures!!!!!! but one thing's for sure, no more insomnia for me! =D

it's been such a bitch trying to search for my raya cum work shoes. yah lah i'm a cheapskate lah cannot afford to buy 2 pairs lah. i just can't seem to find 1 decent pair!!! when i did, none for my size. sighhhhh. and i am gonna be RED this year. =D

k ah, i am rambling like some dumbfuck. oh and before i forget, i am super excited to watch UNGU! 2nd level pon takpe... janji 1st row! haha bye!

2008-09-14T22:03:00.002+08:00

last saturday.

it didn't matter that i felt so ugly and selekeh. it didn't matter that i totally wore the wrong colour bra that day and get teased all day long. it didn't matter that almost all the food places at orchard were full that we had to settle for macdonald's in the end. it didn't matter that i didn't get to buy my heels. it didn't matter that i was sweating like mad at geylang.

cos the most important thing that matters is that i get to meet my dear girls, kin and fara. not forgetting my "long lost brother" zai. =) its been such a long time since i laughed like that.

2008-09-06T15:21:00.004+08:00

i am so exhausted from yesterday's activites. not that it was really tiring anyway.

had work from 9-6 as usual without dee, who was on MC. i got bored pretty quickly cos we usually spent our time working whilst exchanging stupid e-mails, never mind the fact that we sat right across from each other. met up with her and saz afterwards to tampines where saz treated us to seafood! part blanje makan je, MC tak pakai. we went to woodlands bazaar for a little while after that for dee's air kathira (yikes!) and goreng pisang. saz sent us home and then i was out again with firzan! i had really missed him and it felt like there was so much things to catch up with each other. we went to meet the rest of his campmates at geylang bazaar and reached home only at about 2 in the morning. gosh, i spent like almost 24 hours outside. tsk tsk.

i paito-ed my other job today cos its the first day of my period and these cramps just had to strike, only to know that yus didn't come today too. hoho. abis ahh... it was a good thing too that i didn't get to fast today cos i have these huge ulcers in my mouth and i just had to drink a lot of water. prolly going out to break fast with the family and buying my raya clothing later on. if everything's ok, that is. and i may be meeting rizman tomorrow. i miss that asshole laaah.

sigghhh...i wish weekends were longer. =(

on the other hand, i've been listening to ungu songs over and over and surfing stuffs about them because......... *guess what guess what* YES YES YES! =D

2008-08-31T21:34:00.005+08:00

it's 9.30pm and i have yet to shower! i was up only at 5pm today after about 12 hours of sleep. ahhh, what a great sunday :)

i had work from 9-1 yesterday and then plans were a little bit cocked up. first, kin decided not to join me and fara and secondly, fara's pay has yet to come in so she was broke and we couldn't shop. next week ok! of course we're still our usual crazy selfs since we're almost everywhere together. heh. and then me, muhammad and azmi went for a late night movie at AMK since the theatres at town area were all full.

4bia was fucking chibai kanina SCARY. although the 2nd story was stupid lah. i was using my big bag to cover my face almost the whole time and muhd was always trying to pull my bag down. haha. full of suspense gile babi! and the stewardess lawa nak mampos. so we went home together and when muhd was already at his block, i walked quickly at the carpark and i really thought he already went up. skali he had to BOO me from behind! i shouted really loudly ok! like in the middle of the carpark at 3 in the morning. sampai penat aku maki die. hahhahahaha serves you right!

i was actually sad that i missed baybeats for 3 whole days this time round. first of all, i just can't bear to endure the crowd at esplanade. its crazier than ever. secondly, i knew fara would not want to go there no matter what so its no use trying to persuade her or anything. haha. damnnn i miss watching force vormit. =(

BUTTTTTTT! i heard that Ungu is coming to singapore this october!!!!!!!!!!! omg is that for real or what???????? i wanna go i wanna go i wanna go!!! PASHAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!

and guess what. i'm all alone right now and incredible tales is starting soon. although the story this time round looks interesting, i think i'm going to just switch off the tv and go to shower.

2008-08-16T02:19:00.009+08:00

office hours are boring. i tend to get distracted each time i'm being taught and i'll end up sitting at my desk and go "so what now". i think i'm a slow learner. gosh i'm such a loser what is wrong with me!! i'll get the hang of it soon hopefully... the only thing that will always make me wanna laugh out loud is the funny noise in the office. and she happens to sit really near to me! omg..i think i can go crazy trying to hide my laughter each time i hear it. HAHAHAHAHAHA.

so anyway, i had a great time celebrating national day with iza last week. not because of the event but the fact that i get to spend time with her! =) even though it turns out that the tickets she got were not for NDP but for this NTUC event at Padang. it was kinda sucky at first cos of the rain and the shows were boring but at least we got our fun packs to explore. =p the fireworks were fucked up cos a lot of trees were blocking our view! but nevertheless, i had fun. =) and i swear when i met him that night, i was almost speechless cos he looked like the sexiest thing on earth.

i am starting to feel like i have the most unexciting life ever. i need something to perk my life up. seriously... there is something missing and i don't know what. maybe its you. my life has lost its sparkle and i think, its you. just mayyybeee... oh how i soooo wish i'm wrong.

2008-08-02T03:30:00.007+08:00

the only reason i'm updating at 3 in the fucking morning is that i can't sleeeeeep.

so i met wan, amin and oin today. we watched P2 which was kinda creepy but boring and after dinner, they left so i hung out for a while with nana and yani. after which, met up with kin, fara and zai. me and fara went to tampines after that where firzan fetched us and after sending fara to simei, we went to T3 for coffee bean and a short tour around the place since i haven't been there before. haaaaah.

its amazing being able to meet so many people in one day!

but then again, i am feeling so damn bloody lousy right now. suddenly emotional. i feel so unappreciated all of a sudden. there i was, hanging on when i know for the fact that you never needed me anymore. whenever i see you, there's this incredible sense of happiness that i felt that i couldn't feel with anyone else. the familiar butterflies in my stomach. its as if you literally shine out from the rest. i still have the same feelings earlier but i doubt you even noticed i exist. things are so different now, you are so different, its as if i don't even know you at all. i realised everything is not the same as it is before but sometimes, its hard to swallow the painful facts. i've moved on but i just can't seem to get over you. truth hurts and whether i like it or not, i got no choice. at times i feel so hopeless and stupid cos i care about you when i shouldn't be. as far as i know, everything has ended. i wish i'd snapped me back to reality long ago. because you are just like a fantasy. and everyone knows fantasies are not real.

i have always known it's never gonna be possible again. it's just that i refused to grasp the actual situation. good things always comes to an end. and i should have known that the end has already happened long ago. you have always been my favourite one, Amin. i just wish you're not now.

2008-07-31T15:42:00.014+08:00

last weekend was the bomb! its a little too late to update about last week's happenings but what the heck.

we had dinner at Pizza Hut and order everything that is to our heart's content although we only have about $20 left in our pockets. the whooping $90 bill left our mouths hanging. nasib duit cukop kalau tak, fara kene cuci pinggan kat belakang ah. hahahaha.

since it was almost 8pm and kin badly wanted to watch the fireworks, i thought that was okay since we'd be hanging around there for just a bit. still an eyesore anyway, that place. we were there for an hour plus but no fireworks seen. kene trick...habok bunge api pon takde. wahahahhaa.

and then i was soooo happy because my favourite boy came to meet me!!! i've missed him so much! =( and what's kesian is that he was sick, and skinny. the meetup was fast, but still made my day anyway. =)

so after that, all of us walked to clarke quay and chilled till late. and then kin psychoed everybody into not going home. after a few arguments and stupid ideas, we finally settled at a place to crash. watched tv, camwhoring, lesbian poses, ngntok-tapi-tak-boleh-tido, impak maksima & oogling at awal ashaari all the way (thank god for aidil's laptop), ____ FARTED IN HER SLEEP HAHAHAHAH, junk food and coke, puke of potato chips and finally home at 9 in the morning.

what a great night =D

2008-07-25T15:12:00.003+08:00

HAPPY 56th BIRTHDAY MAMA! I love you more than anything else in the world.

my 2nd brother will be bringing the whole family out for dinner later at CCK Park. hope the food's good! so that means, i'll be missing Beach Ball Babes today!!! daaaaaaaamn. Christopher Lee is so yummy looking in the show! with his spiked hair, hot and sweaty body. sheesh. and also Perfect Cut cos Julian Hee's in it!!!!!!!!!!! sooooooo handsomeeee! =D

and anyway, i had one of the biggest shocks of my life today after a phone conversation with a friend. i was so shocked that i was nearly at loss for words. totally speechless.

2008-07-20T16:30:00.002+08:00

fine, i may have said this countless of times already but... i hate city hall/marina square/esplanade on saturdays. i'm sure you know why.

i sent out countless resumes yesterday cos it seems that once i start, i can't stop. i'm just so desperate for a job i guess.

its the time of the month, i have pimples everywhere and i'm like so cranky. plus, i'm craving for a million things right now. i've not even taken my bath or brush my teeth yet. i just feel like rotting on my bed. but i think, i'll go out to meet azmi and muhammad later.

ok la, bye.

2008-07-09T23:57:00.033+08:00

so my last weekend getaway to KL was great! i tagged along fara and her family. now, before anyone of you accuses me of being sibok-sibok nak ikut family orang, i was invited by fara to follow ok. cos her elder sister couldn't make it. the main intention to go there was just to shop and see what KL is like now. since i haven't been out of the country for god knows how many years. kental kan! i know! and we took more pictures indoors cos my camera was SUCH a bitch! they had these lines appearing in the pictures especially when exposed to sunlight. not nice lah. and dissappointingly enough, not much of the stuffs there caught my eye but nevertheless, i had fun. =D

in the bus to KLCC!

see what i mean? irritating k the lines.

with fara's parents.

2nd Day; having breakfast at the hotel. nak omelette ke scrambled egg eh fara? hahaha.

Room 909 Ancasa Hotel.

fara nak melawa je...

aku plak selekeh. nyehheh.

fara's parents&bro in the train.

waiting for the monorail.

posing only. the shopping bags are all fara's. haha. thanks to the 7-eleven store, she's able to shop twice as much as me!

dinner at pizza hut. fara kalau lapar, jangan kacau die... btw she's hungry like 24 freaking hours siak this girl.

with new hoodie kape!

haha. muka mintak smack.

hotel mirror reflection.

Last Day; after checking out, on the way to Lot 10 for breakfast.

waiting for our fooooood...

kite jiwe ar cap same! actually fara sibok, i buy first. haha!

fara's ever favourite pose!

sssssuuuppp yaw?! haha k i look so lelaki.

food's hereeeeeeeee~!

oh, i chanced upon him while exiting! my most favouritest soccer idol seh...

feeling-feeling carwash babes eh. haha.

we went to A&W (classic kepe!) for lunch a few hours later where i almost left my bag!!!! it contains both me and fara's valuables. if she had not turned around and check the seats, i wouldn't wanna know what happen. haha sorry faraaaaaaaa. and while we're in the car enduring the looooooooong ride home, we camwhored like nobody's business. if not that, then we're just sleeping our asses off. its amazing that i did not feel the least nauseous since i always had this motion sickness everytime.

well, i must really thank fara and her family for having me over. =) maybe with friends next time!

***

this morning i was in the bus all grouchy and moody and then i received a call. it was only for a minute and we didn't even talk that much but that alone, was enough to lift up my mood and to plaster a smile on my face every now and then. you know what? each time i wanna let it go, you're making it harder.

before i end this off, i wanna wish a HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY to one of my bestest friends, Nurainsikin! Be happy and stay pretty. =) A belated celebration soon okay? I loooooooooveeeeeeeeeeee yyyooooouuuuuuu!

2008-07-04T03:13:00.005+08:00

it's surprising that somehow, i actually felt okay about it. well maybe not ENTIRELY okay but at least, not upset-till-i-cant-sleep kinda thing. i was kinda relieved too. guess everything is for the better. and furthermore, i KNEW this was coming. i totally knew it. so i guess, not having high hopes and to expect for the worst helps a lot. yes, i've learnt my lesson. =) i think i just need a liiiitle more time to totally let go of everything. true, i felt like lashing out everything that's been bothering me and why i tink its not fair but of course i can't do that. because to think of it, it's not a big deal. waiting is not a big deal what. i don't know if i'm sad but what the fuck right? i should be getting used to this already. hmmm. sometimes when i think about it, i don't mind and i don't care. i'm perfectly fine with the situation. totally optimistic. but on other (emo) times, i feel like crap. i feel used and useless and stupid. confusing.

that's why i always ask myself whether i'm really okay. i'm okay right? or am i just acting okay? bloody hell.

anyway, THIS MOVIE IS THE SHIT.

angelina jolie is soooooooooooo cooooooooollllllll!!!!!!!!! it's seriously worth your every penny. although i watched this for free lah. muahahaha. i have to agree with dee, i love the "he's the motherfucking decoy" part. woooooo.

and this weekend will be a short getaway out of the country. I is sexcited!

2008-07-02T03:01:00.003+08:00

this was last week when we had our sheesha&bitching session over at Mosi Cafe along with Zai & Zaffry. i have to say everything just falls into place everytime i meet these girls. We played pool and Daytona last Monday and we totally went CRAZY shouting and cursing in the arcade. tapi yang penting, i got 1st for the last game!! i was happy, asalkan dapat menang kin. nyehehe! i really miss the rest of the ITE mates though. how about a gathering soon, guys?!

anyway, i think ellen degeneres is the coolest celebrity ever. she's so funny and she always invites these really great people on her show. there was this one time, she had JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE. ohhhhmyyyyggooodd. sexy giler. and she's always so generous! main game bodoh tapi kalah pon, dapat Ipod. no wonder her audience are always so high and happy.

2008-06-22T02:06:00.003+08:00

the boy came aaaaallll the way to hougang just to meet me! today was great because i get to spend time with my favourite boy, fara and also iza, even if its just for a while. and then me and fara walked from orchard to city hall just cos...we felt like walking. refreshing! even if i got blisters all over my feet.

sometimes, i don't think you're joking at all. or even if you really were, i had a feeling that it'll be true someday. i may put up a brave front, or act like all of that don't even matter to me one bit. but the truth is, every single bit matters. although i truly understand the situation and an 'us' thing might be the most impossible thing to achieve, i can't actually deny my feelings. so i guess i'll just smile and listen because at the same time, i want you to treat me as a friend whom you can openly talk to about everything. but the problem is, i care about you more than just that. it has always been you and no one else. if only you can see that...

2008-06-19T00:04:00.003+08:00

you make me feel like i am, you even treated me like that... but am i, really? i love it but sometimes... its not that i don't like it, but i just wonder.

and oh. my cousin wants me to do this since i don't know when. heh.

1. what dissappoints you the most?
FAILURE. which i have been experiencing a lot lately.

2. what are you supposed to do now?
nothing? i just can't sleep.

3. what's the most romantic thing you would like to do with the one you love?
laying under the stars by the beach with my head on his chest and his arms around me, talking about everything and laughing at the littlest things. awwwwwwwwwwww!

4. do you think money can buy happiness?
of course. part of it.

5. if you can have one dream to come true, what would it be?
a stable career i guess, for now.

6. do you believe you can survive without money?
we're living in singapore. are you kidding me?

7. what are you afraid to lose the most?
my family and all those things that you can't buy with money.

8. if you won $1million, what would you do?
hahahaha of course this will never happen. but IF, i'd like to travel rounddddddd the world and blanja all my friends everyday! heh heh.

9. what do you dream of going in the future?
i just wanna be stable and happy, and making the people around me happy too.

10. list out three good points of the person who tagged you.
Aishah is smart, sweet and disciplined. i think?!

11. what makes you happy?
labels and love.

12. what type of person do you hate the most?
orang-orang yang suke bebual world! and people who thinks so highly of themselves.

13. where do you see yourself 10 years down the road?
i can't even envision myself 1 year down the road what more 10? i prefer planning my life on a day-to-day basis.

14. if you could have a superpower, what would it be?
i wanna be SPIDERWOMAN!!

15. what do you think is the most important thing in your life?
all those people who supported me from the back.

16. any childhood memories you would like to re-live?
i miss the days when i would go to my cousin's house often and then play soccer under the void deck...go cycling to nowhere...play catching at the playground...and then went home all sweaty and got scolded by our mothers. childhood life is so carefree!

17. if you have a chance to change your life now, what would you want to change?
i wish i had practiced doing maths until i die.

18. which cartoon character you like most?
spidermannnn!

19. are you courageous enough to go and tell the person that you like he/she?
it depends. i have done that actually. haha.

20. will you dress up specially for that someone?
so far, no. because i'm lazy.

i hope she knows that i took time to answer all these questions. hrmph. i've been sleeping really late and waking up late as well these days, seeing how i have all the time in the world now. it's not healthy. and yeah, i almost died last monday because i have to meet someone unexpectedly. haha. but gosh, i'm still crazy over youuuuu. =)

2008-06-15T14:38:00.004+08:00

i wish i'm staying at the west end of singapore so that i'd be nearer to all of my close friends. so i can just like, meet them whenever i want. it sucks living in the middle of nowhere where everyone is so far from me.

2008-06-12T19:25:00.016+08:00

so i spent the whole of last saturday at sentosa with the mvb peeps. the rain dampens our mood but still, we went ahead. it was my first time trying out the skyride & luge. i was laughed at because i was afraid of heights, i wore the helmet the other way and my luge wouldn't move! THANKS korangs. hahaha. fun lah! something different to do on a weekend. and Songs Of The Sea was a TOTAL waste of money.

kakak nana over here sapu roti for all of us...

***

all i wanted was to see fara happy. i can't stand seeing her upset like that and i am glad that i cheered her up and she's her crazy self again yesterday. but now, everything came tumbling again. all because of the same guy. he's not worth it and you know it. it's up to you babe. i just want the old fara back.

and so they say absence makes the heart grow fonder. so with not much absence now, the heart has grown less fonder? *shrugs* we both know that it won't work out but neither of us wants to say it out loud. its like this 50-50 kinda feeling where everything seems right but it feels so wrong.

2008-06-03T00:21:00.002+08:00

i watched Singapore VS Uzfsagnkngjsgkjskistan game today and i have to say its the most dissappointing match ever. i was bored even before half-time because i simply know, Singapore was gonna lose. thrashed by 7 goals, what a bad lost. but still, i will always love Shahril Ishak forever and ever. and Singapore's so-called "Beckham" can balik kampong! nasib bayar $3 je!

2008-05-27T01:48:00.006+08:00

LIKE, FINALLY!

after eons, we finally met up for dinner and Congkak. which was full of suspense by the way. the sound effects really kurang ajar. while both of them had their dear boyfriends to cling onto during the scary parts, i only had my tiny bag to hug. awwwwww. but Iza, i seriously cannot forget the "scary hand scene". hahaha! and i think we do not need to plan for our outings which usually don't happen. cos this one, is really out of the blue but yet, still successful. korang agree kan?!

on another note, i misssssssssss that boy. i know, nothing new. i was quite relieved when his friend called me the other day. cos i think, that shows that he thinks of me too. =) i miss how he called me bodoh, how he punched my arm playfully although it hurts like hell, how he makes me laugh, his hands in mine and the way he pinches my cheek sometimes. eee rindunye!!!

2008-05-25T03:36:00.004+08:00

last friday was one of the most tiring days i've ever had. i had a really bad start in the morning but thankfully, a better end. I nudged Al when i saw this really cute guy and dengan selambanya, he said "my friend said you look hot!" to him. i was super embarrassed so all i could do was smile. haha JAGA KAU AL.

i had about 3 hours of sleep and i had to wake up in the morning to attend my brother's receiving of scholarship ceremony with my parents and kak fizah. i thought i saw my heartthrob from secondary school but pppfft, false alarm la dey... =( the rest of the day was spent over at my eldest brother's place at jurong where i had a not so comfortable power nap due to my contact lenses and irritating belt.

and now, it's sunday already. i wonder what i should do today.

so as you can see, i lead a pretty mundane life right now. even the weekends suck. i miss my workaholic friends and i'm almost penniless, 3 more days to endure! look at all these wordy posts, it just shows that i've not been snapping pictures in a really long time. tsk. what a sad life.

and i still have a zillion question marks in my head with no one i could turn to for answers.

2008-05-19T02:48:00.003+08:00

i wished i had watched it at the cinemas instead of youtube. i couldn't really make out what they were saying since my speaker is half spoiled and the image is just not that great. but overall, it definitely teaches all of us a thing or two. it wasn't as heart wrenching as i'd expected but the scenes that i cried to was when Fahri said "I love you" to Maria and Aisha had to hear it, and the other one was when they were kissing when Aisha accidentally came into the room. I was like, KESIANNYE!!!!!! She's the only character that has the greatest impact on me for being so fillial, pure and sincere. And she got the most fascinating pair of eyes.

***

I'm sorry if i was jumping to conclusions but i had no idea about it. i really wanted to know what happen because i care. i just hope you hadn't done anything stupid. i know the next time i see you, it's not gonna be anytime soon. i'll wait. i'll just keep on wondering when. hope you will want to see me too. misses.

2008-05-16T02:00:00.002+08:00

i figured that guys are only good with ONE thing and that is, their ego. like seriously, its so huge its even bigger than your head. i didn't even do anything wrong! to think i came all the way down for that? i felt like the stupidest person on earth. i wasn't even angry or anything like that but you made me feel like this. it wasn't really anger it was more of like, i-wish-i-could-shake-you-hard-and-ask-you-what-the-hell-happened kinda feeling. but i knew if i asked, you would have said nothing. i just knew it ok. and i was waaaaaitiiiiing for you to call which i don't know why since i'm supposed to be "angry" at you but i can't help it because you made me feel so ignored when the actual fact is i don't even know why are you acting that way!

but i miss you, all the same. i fucking miss you ok but i don't wanna say it because you know what, i have ego too. this is getting so childish. URGH.

2008-05-12T01:46:00.012+08:00

Happy 21st to Wawan! My cousin a.k.a The Cook. Heh. Just wanna say, good luck for your NS this June. No more a loyal Pastamaniac already. Take care ah kau kat Lim Chu Kang!

In the meantime, I miss these girls SO MUCH!!! Look, they got their ears pierced already!!

You know how I've always loved Saturdays these days and last week was no less great. =) I took a great deal amount of time just to clip my hair up but yet, i was early. He was late and the next thing I knew, he took off my clip while we're walking! RILEK JE LU BOY BUAT GITU. MACAM MAU KASI SIA! (alamak, like fara already HAHA). Just because he claimed I look like a freaking chinese. If only you knew how much I struggled to clip my hair perfectly. TSK.

Mother's Day was lonely here because I was expecting all my aunties and cousins to come but none did. =( I spent the day sleeping my ass off to make up for the lack of sleep I've been having. No thanks to insomnia. These dark circles are getting from bad to worse, no amount of concealer could cover it up already. Besides that, a few people have commented that I've lost weight, even my mum whom I see everyday and that is a wonder cos I will ransack the kitchen to find food at 3am every day without fail because I can't sleep at night anymore and I always get SO HUNGRY and always ended up eating rice and I thought, isn't that supposed to make me fatter?

Life is funny, like they say.

2008-05-06T01:47:00.003+08:00

Kehangatan terasa di jiwa
Tika kau lafaz kata cinta
Nafas terhenti seketika
Seakan sukar ku percaya

Ku juga mencintai dirimu
Mengapa sukar ku luahkan
Bukan sengaja ku menahan
Bibir membeku lidah terkelu

i know this is like a super old song but it means so much... for me, at least =)

its like a totally new feeling inside me when i look at you now.

2008-05-04T22:13:00.003+08:00

like the malay proverb goes

"pisang berbuah dua kali".

or simply, it happened again.

when i read the text message, i was numb. because seriously, i was so sick knowing that the situation occured yet again.

but after hearing all the confessions and whatnots, i don't know if i should be happy or not.

the only question that's been ringing in my head is "why again?"

2008-04-28T01:01:00.008+08:00

i think i really have to blog about this. its gonna be a typical narrative story.

yesterday was a day filled with a whole lot of question marks. after fitri's mini birthday celebration at lau pa sat, i made my way to bukit panjang to meet my dearest favourite boy :) with izyani since she stayed around the area too. we decided to take the bus from there but there were none in that area. so we walked to fullerton hotel and waited for 700 for 20 minutes only to realise that the last bus that day was at 2pm. !!!!!!!! so we waaaaalked to esplanade and waited for 960 for 35 freaking minutes! we finally reached at about 12 plus and after we parted ways; she went to the LRT station while i confidently told her i'll walk and find the block myself, this guy whom i supposed was a filipino approached me and started asking me the randomest question.

"I just needed a female opinion on this. My friend has been dating this girl for over 3 months and he stopped her from going out with other guys. If you were her, would you hate your guy? Dump him?"

I was thinking, "WHY THE HELL ARE YOU EVEN ASKING ME?! DO I LOOK LIKE I EVEN CARE? BUKIT PANJANG-IANS HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO IS IT? SO THEY ALWAYS ASK STUPID BGR QUESTIONS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT TO TOTAL STRANGERS?!"

and then he started blabbering which i couldn't absorb at all because i was in shock! I swear i thought he was gonna ask a dirty question when he claimed he needed a "female opinion". i have all these thoughts running through my mind like, what if he molested me and ran away? things like that. i know, i'm so paranoid! I was sooo relieved when izyani called me and ask me what happened. She was so kind to make her way out of the LRT and accompanied me all the way to his block! and she even waited with me for the boy to get ready. She said that sex maniacs usually lurk around in that area and she doesn't want anything to happen to me. SWEET KAN. Hahaha. I was touched lah, she really waited until the boy appears and that was already 1am plus and there were no more LRT service. Of course, i insisted in giving her money for her cabfare.

so THAT, was a really super interestingly weird trip to bukit panjang.

so then, its just me and the boy. i admit that at first i was pissed because NR3 took such a long time to come and it was scorching hot, both of us were sweating like fuck. it didn't help that he showed tantrums at the beginning. but everything was okay when both of us cooled down (literally) in the air-coned bus. and plus, i have to say HE LOOKED SO BLOODY GOOD THAT DAY. suka skali! while i on the other hand, feel like a total shit because i've been out since afternoon and my face was all oily and sweaty. haha. it was just a movie afterwards and we just spent the night away talking. just the two of us! i love love love love love it. =)

so as the horoscope says...

"All of your efforts to connect with a certain someone are working, but they might be working too slowly for your taste. That's too bad, though -- this is one time when you can't push things. You will have to be patient and let them come around in the way they want and at the speed they want. Waiting won't be fun, but think about it this way -- your reward will be sweet, and you will know that it comes from a very genuine place. It won't be the result of any pressure or manipulation."

i have never thought that i will like him this much. and funny too, cos i've never felt it in a pretty long time already. but then again, i am still trying to brush out that doubt i have once in a while.

i think i sound like a hopelessly-in-love freak today. ppfffttt. its just like err, a reallly really really huuuuge crush lah. hehehe =p

2008-04-24T00:26:00.012+08:00

it finally hit me when my friend i barely knew talk to me abt it over msn. he was nagging!! and i HATE to be nagged but he does make a point although i felt like a total freak. ok, next week. i'm gonna start. PROMISE. i. think. ?

i've been sitting at home all day today. a small part of me was lazy, and another huuuge part of me wanted to save on my ez-link fare! yes, its that bad. i did help around with the housework so i guess, it's a pretty fruitful day.

and, i miss azimah! i've not seen her ever since school ended months ago. like, where the hell are you?!

i miss this stupid boy also... although i always ended up not answering his calls! haha!

and of course! my 2 lovelies...

and yep, i am still not over school. while others have started working and leading their own lives, i am still in envy seeing people in uniforms hurrying to school. i guess i just miss the people there... and the western food. and the student fare definitely!

and sometimes i miss my natural hair... grrr.

about him? well, he's still my faaaavourite boy. =)

2008-04-16T01:51:00.005+08:00

I haven’t got a clue if you’re the one
But I like you
And ooh I like how you make me feel
I wanna do this right
Don’t wanna waste this night
But I’m drowning
Drowning in your love

Bring me flowers
And talk for hours
And ooh I like you
And ooh I like how you make me feel
Kiss my face
Your warm embrace
And ooh I like you
And ooh I like how you make me feel

I’m a little scared to hold you close
Cause I just might never ever let you go
Caught up in your smile
I’m happy as a child
But I’m still drowning
Drowning in your love

i swear i love this song!

you know what, most of the time i think i'm stupid. sometimes i think i have no idea what i am getting myself into. sometimes i wonder is it even right? sometimes i wish i didn't have to deal with it so much. sometimes i don't really know if any of this is worth it. sometimes i think i get too carried away.

i know its way early but i guess i am just scared. YES, AFRAID. because as much as i am enjoying every moment, something just tells me otherwise. something is just not right... somewhere. and i don't freaking know what.

maybe i think too far too fast. i tend to do that a lot in this matter. if only i'd "think far" on more important stuffs. ha-ha. all i need to have is a little patience. it's just a gut feeling i hope. so please tell me i'm just paranoid. relax... play it cool... keep it slow... think positive... yada yada yada...

my mum and aunt have been nagging at me for being unemployed (on a full-time basis, that is). they've been giving me job options but i am not interested to hear!!! even my friends have started nagging! hahaha. i know they meant well, but my heart is really closed for a job now. i don't know why.
everything also don't know. don't know what, don't know why, don't know when. SIGH. AND I CAN'T BELIEVE ITS ONLY WEDNESDAY!!! shit. there i go again.

2008-04-13T22:19:00.005+08:00

my hp line's been cut, i can't make outgoing calls or smses.
no more student fare now, i have to start living with the ever expensive adult fare.
i think i'm losing weight, which is not healthy.
i am gonna be broke soon, i knew it.
so lazy to search for a job.

in the meantime, i swear today is my most zombified day. i didn't sleep for the whole night yakking away with my favourite boy till morning and then i took the torturous journey to bukit panjang. i was excited! and being the legong self that i already am, i dropped off at the wrong LRT station. wahahaha that was hilarious. we had breakfast and spent the remaining time just talking. i miss having those moments, with anyone. and was glad to experience it again, with him. =) i dropped by kin's place after that for a short nap and then to town for a little shopping spree for the guys.

and yep, three weeks is DEFINITELY a long time. but it's ok, i'll hang on... anything for you, my friend. *grins*

2008-04-06T17:22:00.004+08:00

looook at that stupid face! =p

i finally got back my watch today. hahaha. but more importantly, spending time with my faaavourite boy (plus wan) makes my sunday. although my saturday was kinda sucky, but still! i wish we can have the whole day to ourselves. i miss you already!

2008-04-04T01:28:00.003+08:00

i'm satisfied with my results cos i got all A's!!!!!!! and my GPA went up from 2.8 to 3.1. of course i was happy, and very shocked. but what's the use. i didn't get into ANY polytechnic. although i was kinda expecting the bad news, i was still a little hopeful you know.

i am so bloody upset!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! like, what the fuck should i do now?! try appealing? this is like the SECOND time i did not manage to secure myself into some stupid poly. i remember the last time i appealed, it was so tedious and frustrating because i had to travel all the way to ngee ann poly by myself on a scorching hot weather. i almost lost my way because i was so dumb around west areas. i left my phone in the toilet and only remembered it when i was about to get on the train but obviously when i went back, it was gone and plus, the phone's not mine. i remember i called my ex boyfriend up using the public phone and he refused to pick up but when he did, i started crying so bad and he screamed at me for being so whiny.

okay. i sidetracked a lot but i swear that had to be the worst day of my life, it was so horrible! i don't wanna go through all of that again just for the sake of appealing which lasted for only 5 measly minutes. and to make things worse, it was UNSUCCESSFUL! haaaaaaaa-haaaaaaaa. -_-" furthermore, most friends's friends of mine have GPA of 4 and yet they still can't get in. so what makes you think someone like me can huh? i am so sick of this!!!!!!!! why can't you just make me attain my diploma normally like everyone else?! (whoever the you is for).

because the bottomline is, I STILL WANT TO STUDY. i do not want to work full-time yet. i am just not ready to be a no-lifer and i have no money to take private diploma. booooooo!

i am not weighing my options very wisely now because i am still not focusing. i can't concentrate properly. so i'll prolly think properly tomorrow.

so, these weekends better be good. i am counting on it to cheer me up. i am soooooooooooo hoping to see you this week! i don't know why but i suddenly wanna meet you so badly today!! or at least, talk to you. =( shit, i think... i miss you? =/ k i better stop because i think you might be reading this. sheesh.

i am in a i-have-no-mood-to-talk-please-just-get-out-of-my-face mood. its that bad. i have a left sore eye! i think i'm having PMS. actually, i AM definitely having PMS lah. ARGH!!!!!!

2008-03-31T23:00:00.002+08:00

i think everyone want to congkong (?!?!) my stuffs ah. katrina took my bracelet LAST WEEK and she have yet to give it back. she better do before she go back to phillipines tomorrow!!! and someone took my favourite watch!! but fortunately, he's my faaaaavourite boy so that's okay =D heeeheee!

last saturday was awesome cos i get to meet all of my loved ones. the sleepover at kin's was a blast, although they slept the whole night away when they said they won't! agaknye dah penat nyanyi lagu taubat lah tu. hahahaha! thankfully my faaaavourite boy (haha it just sounds nice) was there to accompany me till almost 9 in the morning. =)))

and my dear fara minahrep =p, GET WELL SOON! just know that we're not trying to make you feel bad, but we're just stating the facts to knock sense into your head. wake up fara!!!!!! we love you. *mmmuah!*

2008-03-29T04:29:00.012+08:00

a few days' back was haziq's 5th birthday! there was no cake or any celebration for him until my cousin, wawan came with this...

he baked that himself, believe it or not. i was pretty skeptical in trying the cake at first because he claimed he baked that in a rush but it was niceeeeeeeee! chocalatey like hell, just the way i like it. but then again, i have always personally thought he's a good cook. he makes the best nasi goreng EVER. sumpah sedap nak mampos. yet, i can't even cook. nyehhheh.

these 2 girls are the ones that can drive me up the wall or make me happy after a bad day. imagine, i was trying to put fiza to sleep after 2 freaking hours but to no avail. in fact, she still wanted to giggle and play with me. i gave up, so i put her next to my mum and after she patted fiza and whatnots, she slept. within 10 minutes. i was sooo annoyed! what the hell, how did my mum do that?!

fina is always with her big round eyes.

fizaaa!

kids are like that, they're so annoyingly adorable. there are certain times when i feel like throwing them out of the window especially when they cry in the middle of the night and disturb my sleep. i'm cruel ha-ha. try and be in my shoes lah! 2 babies crying at once ok!

and i have yet to give haziq a birthday present. poor boy. every night when i come home he'll be like "beli present tak? beli present tak?" tak tau malu peh budaaaaak.

p/s: its saaaaaturday tomorrrrrrrow! i hope with all my heart to see you. =) then i'll be sleeping over at kin's at night, just for the fun of it. =D we're gonna have an awesome bitching session.

2008-03-23T02:26:00.002+08:00

my mum ALMOST found out my biggest secret that I've been hiding from her all these while. i swear that was so fucking close!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

on another note, i am a happy goober today cos i did a little shopping with fara. teeheee. and a bigggg biigggggg THANK YOU to my dearest girls azimah, kin and fara for the Guess wallet!!!!!!! though its a really really belated bday gift, hahaha i am still ever so touched. it was really a surprise cos i didn't see it coming at all. *blows kisses*

the only sad thing was that you're not home today. boohooo but that's okay... another week, hopefully. i dreamt so much about you recently, it gets so embarrassing. haha. i miss how easy it is for me to laugh and be happy just talking to you. awwwwwww... =p

and a last shoutout to kin, stop being so paranoid! the 3 of us have so many activities lined up, i hope it eventually happens one by one. can't wait can't wait can't wait...!

2008-03-16T23:51:00.002+08:00

i am trying not to pay too much attention to the Step Up 2 dvd that's playing behind me cos i wanna watch it at the movies! a promise will be a promise. =) i can say i am fully recovered now, except for the cough. god, its been a week. i have never been sick for a week in my life. so yeah, i spent my saturday at home. bummer. but all's good. i think i'm at the peak of the clouds =) anyway thanks eh oin!!! for making me malu. hmmmph~

i know i've yet to post a sad entry about how school has ended and everything. i still can't believe ITE life is officially over for me. it definitely feels weird not seeing those familiar faces again. i have a loooong pixelated entry coming up. memories, memories. =( i miss ISO already.

2008-03-15T01:48:00.004+08:00

As i was destressing myself a few days ago, i came upon this Youtube celebrity Ryan Higa or better known as Nigahiga. i think he's hilarious. And super cute. i even watched almost all of his 43 vids. =p

I'm recovering from a 40 degree fever. tomorrow is saturday. PLEASE DON'T LET ME BE SICK ON A SATURDAY. PLEASE.

2008-03-05T22:47:00.007+08:00

first and foremost, HAPPY 23rd BIRTHDAY IZA! May you be blessed with the best of happiness and health. I love you babe! Hope to see you soon. =)

anyway, MY FRONTPAGE PROJECT IS DONE! That was a total relief. i spent the night at kin's house on monday with the intention of doing it till the morning and then off to school BUT my 2am nap turned out to be a 12-hour sleep. HAHA. it was cold and her bed was so comfy, plus, she refuses to wake me up. thanks eh kin... and this morning when i opened the disc at school, the pictures refuses to show!!!!!!!!!! sumpah that was so irritating!!! every picture got cross. haiya but then again, its too late. =( so now, focus on exams.

tapi yang penting, I WANNA STAY AT BUKIT BATOK AND ORDER MACDONALDS EVERYDAY! hehehehehehe.

2008-03-03T00:20:00.003+08:00

Batu keramat
Batu nisan
Call lah cepat
Sebelum I pengsan

that is just about the most ridiculous pantun I've ever heard in my whole life. but coming from you, its cute as hell. (HAHA) you made everything seemed so carefree and comfortable. although i fucking hate esplanade on saturdays, its okay cos you made me laugh the whole day till my tummy and jaw hurts. and there's that amazing smile you gave when our eyes met. i melted for over 10 times that day. =p definitely one of the most unforgettable days of my life. i am so over the moon laaaahhh~~~!! =)))))))))))))))))))))

what sucks is that, i have to attend school from 8-5 this whole week to sort of make up for the days i've been missing. and appeal results will only be out on friday. i've not even started on my frontpage project which is due in 2 days. i know nuts about frontpage. i know, i'm the world's best procrastinator.

2008-02-25T21:54:00.013+08:00

my weekends were somewhat great... =D i had tulangs and satay on saturday with kin and zai and to arab st after that where we met fara and her friends for sheesha!

yay i love my girls!

sorry, aku lampost. hahaha.

and they had cats there. FREAKING CATS. me and fara almost went crazy.

and then i had a 7-hour conversation on the phone. that broke my personal record already. well done! haha. its great to have someone that you can talk to for hours and hours about e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g. god, it really feels good! i'm not exaggerating, am i? hahah wellll.. its just that i've never felt SO comfortable with someone i sort of just knew. i promise i won't take 2 months to reply your letter this time round. =D

and as expected, i'm debarred for PR. Congrats la zuliana. of course i'm gonna appeal and ask help from azimah who's err, more experienced. HAHA.

so anyway, i just felt like doing this. haha gosh its been a long timeeee...

What time is it? 10.20pm

What is today's date? (MM/DD/YYYY) 02/25/2008.

Who was the last person to call you baby? no one, really!

What is your relationship status? single and mingling. heh.

Has anyone ever sang to you? oh yes yes yes!! even though the voice is a bit sengau, i still melt! haha =p

If you were abandoned in the wilderness,would you survive? WHO KNOWS. i think i'll die of fear. haha confirm.

Who do you text the most? fara & kin. the phone's silent most of the time lah.

What does your last incoming text say? jay informing us his new number.

What does your last outgoing text say? "Fina da klua? Aku baru on tv."

What is your favorite color? red & green. ok, so that's more than one.

What color are your eyes? dark and boring.

Who was the last person to say they loved you and when? kin! on my tagboard! hahaha.

Do you like your parents? i love 'em.

Do you secretly like someone? i don't think its a secret anymore. not to my girlfriends at least... heh.but i secretly like this barista from starbucks lido. its a secret cos his gf works there also lah. boring. hahahaha.

Why did your last relationship end? cos he wanted to be with another girl.

Who was the last person you said you loved on the phone? nobody!

Where is the furthest place you've been? JOHOR BARU. pathetic i know, hahahaha.

Which do you prefer, to eat or sleep? eat and then sleep!

Do you look more like your mom or your dad? definitely mum.

Are you flexible? as in?

What movie do you want to see? jumper! i have a free ticket that's gonna expire soooon.

What did you do on New Years eve 2008? searching frantically for a toilet!!

Was your mom a cheerleader? no. but she was sexy. really.

Can you speak any other language besides English? malay, a bit of chinese and boyanese.

What is the last letter of your middlename? I?

How many hours of sleep did you get last night? 10 freaking hours. i skipped school. i was sick la ok!

Do you wear your seatbelt in the car? when i sit up front only.

Are you scared of flying? i've never been on an aeroplane lah. haha kesiannye budak nie.

Is your hair curly or straight? straight.

Do you have any tattoo? naaah~

Do you like funny people or serious people? funny!!!!

Have you ever been to Los Angeles? macam perli aku je. the furthest i've been to is JB siak... nak tanye lagi pe...

What jewelry do you wear all the time? only when im out.

What are your plans for tonight? maybe watch a movie online.

What is your favorite song at the moment? oh ballads. i am so into ballads right now.

What song do you HATE? err, irritating ones i guess.

Do you like chocolate? YUMMEH.

Are you easy to get along with? i think so? although i'll be quite reserved at first. pemalu katekan..nyehehe

Are you a happy person? most of the time, yeah!

Any upcoming events you're excited about? exams? hurhur. next saturday!!!

Who/What is on your mind now? i don't actually know... =p

because it's wrong, it's not worth it, it's naive, it's stupid... but i just feel like i wanna take the risk. if it's really gonna be a mistake, then let me do it myself. i wanna see how making a mistake feels. i don't have faith, i have no hope. i'm just letting things flow.